I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize