Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Randomize