Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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