I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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