I want to make a zoo with you.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
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