windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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