This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I just forgot I was standing up.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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