in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize