But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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