did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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