Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize