Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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