You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
