We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
