The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
