i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
