real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
