You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
