my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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