so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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