i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I will be naked everywhere
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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