No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize