Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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