i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
