How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
