420 ftw
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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