I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
