I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
