remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Randomize
