is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize