Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize