he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Randomize
