I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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