Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I don't think brook has ever known best
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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