with your own penis?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
the liver wants what the liver wants
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
