he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
