I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
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