guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
last night I used snow as a chaser
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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