What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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