Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Randomize
