I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
The air was thick with penises
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize