my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
