There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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