Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
