it was like eating out sand paper
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize