hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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