We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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