is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize