I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
