I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
